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Cast

  • Stan Marsh
  • Kyle Broflovski
  • Eric Cartman
  • Butters Stotch
  • Token Black
  • Jimmy Valmer
  • Cheerleaders
  • Girls Skipping Rope
  • Herbert Garrison
  • Mr. Mackey
  • Principal Victoria
  • Jimbo Kern
  • Gerry's Family (Gerry, Karin, Rachel, Constance)
  • George's Family (George, Mom, and Daughters)
  • Federal Agents
  • Announcer and reporters
  • Captain and his workers
  • Man and Woman on front lawn
  • Pilot and Copilot
  • Nelly's Mom
  • Flight Attendant
  • Passengers
  • Judge
  • Occupant
  • Protester

Script

World War Zimmerman
South Park Elementary, day, the school halls. Token is at his locker switching books when Cartman comes 'round the corner
Cartman
Hey Token! [walks up to Token] What's up, bro?
Token
Nothing.
Cartman
"Nothin'" Me neither. Nothin's goin' on. Sucks. [sniffs] Everything good with you?
Token
Yeah.
Cartman
Sweet. [Jimmy walks over and Cartman notices him] Hey Jimmy, what are you doin'?
Jimmy
Uh, I'm just gettin' ready for cla-
Cartman
Yeah, I'm just hangin' out with Token. Did you know that if it wasn't for African-Americans, we wouldn't have Rock & Roll? So cool that we have a black President. [Jimmy walks away and Token is done at his locker] About time. [Stan and Kyle stop to watch]
Stan
Is he doing it again?
Kyle
He's doing it a-gain.
Cartman
Dude, um, what are doing after school, Token? You wanna, you wanna hang out? [Token puts one last book in before closing his locker]
Token
I uhhh, have band practice.
Cartman
God you are sooo cool. Alright bro, I'll catch you at recess. [makes a fist with his left hand and straightens out his arm toward Token] Fist bump. Fist bump, bro. [Token reluctantly makes a fist with his right hand and bumps Cartman's fist with it. He leaves, and Cartman moves on in a happy mood, stopping by Stan and Kyle]
Stan
Cartman, are you feeling alright?
Cartman
Yeah, I feel great. Why? [looks back] You think something's wrong? [moves on, not smiling]
Herbert Garrison's classroom, later in the day. He's teaching about the French Revolution by way of Les Misérables, on the chalkboard.
Herbert Garrison
Alright, now the French Revolution was basically started by a young man named Marius. [underlines the name], who only knew Jean Valjean as an older man, and uh- [Cartman interrupts him with a grunt] ...uh, the French government at the time was led by Javert, who was trying to-
Cartman
Mister! [Herbert Garrison turns around] No! Stop, Token, stop! My brains! Stop eating my brains! Brad Pitt! [wakes up violently and looks bewildered. Token is stunned, and Herbert Garrison, with his arms crossed, is not pleased.] Hey Token. What's up, bro? [makes a fist and extends it towards Cartman] Fist bump? [Token is unmoved and upset]
Moments later, at Mr. Mackey's office...
Mr. Mackey
Eric, somethin' is clearly wrong, m'kay, and it would be best to jus' get it out in the open.
Cartman
It's Token. I think he's a ticking time bomb.
Mr. Mackey
And why do you think Token is a tickin' time bomb?
Cartman
He's pissed off. Because of something that happened a long time ago but he won't forget.
Mr. Mackey
Do you think he blames you for somethin'?
Cartman
But it wasn't me, it wasn't my fault!
Mr. Mackey
Wull have you, thought about maybe writin' your feelin's down? In a poem? Uh- write a poem and give that to, g-give that to Token?
Cartman
No, it's too gay. It would only make things worse.
Mr. Mackey
Well Eric, you need to do somethin' because you keep losing sleep. M'kay and sleep is very important to your success at school. M'kay?
Cartman
M'kay. Ahah-I'll be m'kay.
Mr. Mackey
M'kay, you sure? Because I'm here when you need me.
Cartman
M'kay.
Cartman's room, night. He's having nightmares.
Cartman
No, Token! Leave Brad Pitt alone! Brad Pitt is fighting zombies! No ah Token, Token!
Cartman's dream, morning. He voices all the characters in it. A family is seated in a breakfast nook in a kitchen. The girls are giggling.
Karin
[serving pancakes] Eat your breakfast, girls. [turns around to put the pan back on the stove]
Rachel
Where's Daddy?
Karin
You can eat without your father in the room. Now hurry. [the girls giggle and the older one notices someone]
Rachel
Daddy!
Gerry
Good morning, girls. [walks in fully dressed, with a cup of coffee already in hand.] Save Daddy any pancakes? Look at that? Six A.M. and my family is already smiling. [Karin walks over and kisses him]
Karin
How did I get such a perfect husband?
Gerry
How did I get such a beautiful wife?
Rachel
I love you, Dad.
Gerry
I love you too, Princess. I love both of you, equally.
Karin
Nothing can ever go wrong, so long as we all have each other.
News report inside the dream. Gerry turns around to see the TV
Reporter
Today apparently will be the day! CNN has just received word that a verdict in the George Zimmerman trial is expected to come at any moment! Zimmerman is accused of shooting Trayvon Martin, and a jury will now decide his fate.
Constance
Daddy, who is Trayvon Martin?
Gerry
[turns around] Nobody. L-let's just get you girls to school.
Cartman's dream, downtown, some minutes later. He's on a one-way street with a bunch of other cars all trying to move, but stuck. Somehow, the family remains chipper
Gerry
Is it bigger than a bread box?
Rachel
What's a bread box, Dad?
Constance
Heehee, Dad is so kewl.
Karin
You can say that again.
Gerry
[getting worried] Why aren't we moving? What's gong on? [turns on the radio to 106.7 FM and Michael Bublé's "It's A Beautiful Day" comes out of the speakers. The family sways along to the beat. A news report comes on the air]
Reporter
We interrupt this cool song for a news bulletin. A verdict has just been handed down in the case of George Zimmerman. In a shocking turn of events, the jury has found George Zimmerman not guilty!
Gerry
Oh my God. [fleeing white people run by his car, quickly overtaken by pissed-off black people]
Reporter
Many African-Americans are outraged by the verdict, and they are most likely about to go totally nanners. [some of them surround the car. One of them punches a window and cracks it, a second cracks the passenger window with his head, a third crawls up on the hood and breaks the windshield with his head, sticking his head inside the car]
Gerry
AAAAAH!
Protester
Fuck you, Brad Pitt!
Gerry
Let's bail! [steps on the gas and runs over a protester, ripping him to shreds. His car runs into another car and the protester on his hood flies off.] Everyone get out of the car! Go! [the family gets out and runs through the rioting crowd. They climb up a fire escape and onto the roof of a building, then look down over the riot. What they see is amazing: African-Americans converge and climb the side of the building in a great mass of humanity. Some of them fall back towards the street, but the mass gets closer and closer to the roof] Oh my god RUN! [they turn left and come face to face with... Token] WAAH! Token. No, Token, we had nothing to do with this. I know you're pissed off, but but be reasonable!
Token
Fuck you, Brad Pitt!
Gerry
No! Nonono! [Token lunges at him] Nooo! [Cartman wakes up, touches himself to make sure he's there, and chuckles nervously]
South Park Elementary, day, the school halls. Token is at his locker switching books when Cartman comes 'round the corner. This time, he looks beat and walks slowly. He sees Token and walks towards him. He didn't get much sleep, and he sounds it
Cartman
Hey Token? How are you doing?
Token
I'm good.
Cartman
That's awesome. I'm so stoked that we're best friends. [puts his left fist forward] Fist bump. [leans to his left a little] Fist bump. [Token closes his locker and hurries away]
Mr. Garrison's classroom, later in the day. Cartman is having nightmares again.
Cartman
No! My wife, Token! Token, that's my wife!
Token
Okay, really?
Cartman
No Token! Stop beating my daughter! NOOO! [wakes up]
Mr. Mackey's office, some minutes later.
Mr. Mackey
Now Eric, whatever it is you and Token are going through, you need to talk through it, m'kay? The problems you two are havin' have become a distraction for everybody else. Agreed?
Cartman
Agreed.
Mr. Mackey
Okay. Token, come on in, please. [the door opens and Token walks in, closing it behind him. Token takes a seat next to Cartman]
Cartman
Hoh boy, here we go.
Mr. Mackey
Token, I've been talkin' with Eric and he's really upset that you two aren't gettin' along. You have some things you wanna say, Eric?
Cartman
[after a few seconds] Token, I wasn't on that jury. Okay?
Token
...What jury?
Cartman
This grudge that you're holding against an entire group of people should be directed at just a few, not at me.
Mr. Mackey
Okay Token, what are your feelings about that?
Token
[looks at Eric for a few seconds, then answers] I don't know what to say.
Cartman
I wrote a poem. Is it okay if I read my poem? [pulls out his poem and begins] It's called "I Was Not The Bullet." [clears his throat]

I was not the bullet. I was not the gun.
I was not the juror that set the shooter free.
I was not the trigger. I was not the hate.
Nor was I the judge, but still, you judge me?
I was not the black family mourning for the dead.
"Oooo, somebody shot our children. Lordy, what we do now?"
I was not the verdict.

Token
This isn't a poem. It doesn't even rhyme.
Cartman
It's going to rhyme, Token, just hold on.

I was not the shooter. I was not the gun.
So Token, you should be cool while we're all here at school.

[folds his poem up and puts it away.]
Token
Can I go back to class now?
Mr. Mackey
Eric, do you feel better about all this?
Cartman
Yeah, yeah I do. I think we really had a breakthrough here.
Mr. Mackey
Okay, thanks Token. [Token gets up and leaves the office]
Cartman
It's gonna be okay. I think we're all safe now.
South Park Elementary, day, the gym. The students are assembled there. The cheerleaders take the court. Among them is Lorraine, who has previously been mocked for her clothes
Cheerleaders
We are Cows, proud and true! Come on, South Park, moo moo moo! Goooo Cows!
Principal Victoria
Ooookay, thank you, cheerleaders. That was very nice. Ahhh, next we have a student who would like to perform an original rap song, [Nicole sits down next to Token] based on his award-winning poem, "I Was Not The Bullet," with backup music by Butters Stotch. [Butters walks up, takes the mic, and starts beatboxing. Cartman walks up and starts rapping]
Cartman (Butters)

Black or white, it's alright. Black or white, let's not fight.
I was not the bullet. I was not the gun.
I was not the jury, so don't blame me, son!
James my man was wrong (It's not our fault). James my man was wrong (It's not Eric's fault).
Black or white, it's alright. Black or white, let's not fight.

White people say Ho-oh!

The kids

Ho-oh.

Cartman

Black people say He-ey! [Token and Nicole stay quiet] Cool. White people say Ho ho! [Token and Nicole begin to get mad]

The kids

Ho ho!

Cartman

Black people say Hey hey hey! [no reply] Uh oh, I think the white people are winning! White people got you beat, black people; you'd better represent! Let me hear you say "I don't blame the white people. No no no!"

Token
[stands up in defiance] Alright, that's enough! [Butters stops and looks, then gets dismayed] You think I should feel bad for you because of the Trayvon Martin verdict?!
Cartman
Token, calm down.
Token
What the hell is wrong with you?! Why are you all here listening to this?!
Cartman
Oh God here it comes! Get down everybody! Get down now! [throws his mic down and runs off]
The neighborhood. Cartman runs into view, rounds the corner and runs towards home
Cartman
Clear the streets! Everyone clear the streets! We've gotta get the fuck out of here! [runs inside his house] Mom it's starting! We've gotta go! [runs up to his room and opens a drawer. He rifles through it looking for something] Come on, come on! [finds a red safety box with "BRAD PITT SURVIVAL GEAR" printed on the lid and on the panel under the clasp. He opens it and pulls out a gun and a Brad Pitt costume. He puts the costume on, takes the gun, and runs out into the street] Come on, we've gotta move! It's spreading! Let's go! [nearby, a couple is on their front lawn. The man is trimming bushes while his wife is shoveling snow by the front door.]
Woman
Does that little boy have a gun?
Man
Get inside. [drops his shears and heads for the door]
Woman
But-
Man
Get inside! [they both go inside. Cartman crosses the stret and a car almost runs him over, but he sidesteps the car and holds his gun out. The car stops and he gets inside]
Cartman
[frantically] Driiive! You've gotta driiive! Nooow!
Nelly's Mom
What's going on?!
Cartman
Get to an airport!
Nelly's Mom
An airport?! But...?
Cartman
We've got about ten minutes before this entire country is up in flames! If you wanna live, you'd better step on the gas! Oh wait, is this a Tesla? Shit! Well press on the prissy pedal! We're gonna die!! [she presses the pedal and takes off]
The airport, later.
Announcer
Now calling rows 10 through 30 for boarding.
Cartman
The outbreak has started! We've gotta get the fuck out of here! [enters the tunnel]
Passenger 1
An outbreak? [covers his mouth with his sweater]
Passenger 2
Which one?
Cartman
Get on the flight! Let's move! Let's go go go go! [Nelly's Mom rushes into the plane. Three black security guards appear] Oh my God! [closes the plane's door and locks it. The guards try to get in, but Cartman holds the handle down with all his might]
Pilot
My God, what's going on out there?
Cartman
The outbreak's starting! Fly the plane now! [the plane takes off moments later]
The airplane, now in the air and safe to walk around in
Copilot
Maybe now you can tell us what the hell is going on?!
Cartman
The e-... The end of the world? We've got one shot and one shot only and that's to find a place where the contagion won't reach us!
Passenger 3
What contagion? My wife didn't get on the plane. [to the copilot] Take this plane back to Denver!
Cartman
You don't understand. There's no Denver left to go back to! [the passengers all take their seats.]
The control tower. Everyone there is running around trying to figure out how a plane got off without authorization
Captain
Alright what the hell is going on here?!
Worker 1
We don't know anything. First there was talk of a hijacking, then reports of an outbreak of some kind.
Worker 2
Confirmed report of panic in a rural town in the Colorado Rockies!
Worker 3
Sir, the pilot of flight 82 wants an update. They're asking permission to land.
Captain
Stall them. I don't want that plane landing anywhere until we know what the hell we're dealing with!
Worker 4
[walks up with a book] Sir, you'd better look at this. This was found in the airport lavatory. It seems to be a survival guide of some kind.
Captain
Survival of what?
Worker 4
From the looks of it, a contagion outbreak of the worst kind. [the book shows a page of black zombies attacking everyone else]
Captain
Oh my God.
Pilot
DA43 to tower, please advise! [hangs up the mic] Damnit! They aren't telling me anything!
Copilot
Do you think it's a virus?
Pilot
Virus, bacteria, either way we're all dead! Find out if he thinks it's safe to land in Los Angeles.
Copilot
What about Los Angeles? Can we take the plane to Los Angeles?
Cartman
Not a chance. By now most of the urban cities will be compromised. This whole things from city to city. We need to go somewhere the trend won't take hold. Like Iceland. [points to the island on a map.]
Copilot
This plane won't make it to Iceland!
Passenger 3
You got a better idea, asshole?!
Cartman
Everyone quiet! I have to think!
Nelly's Mom
Yes, let him think!
Cartman
I can't think here. I need a magazine and a toilet. [heads off to the restroom. He sees the "vacant" sign and opens the door, only to see a black man on the toilet]
Occupant
Oh, I'm just finishing up.
Cartman
Nah! [shuts the door and jumps back, then throws everything he can at the door so the occupant can't exit]
Occupant
Hey!
Cartman
[running back to his seat] One of them is in the back!
Nelly's Mom
What?!
Passenger 3
What do you mean?!
Copilot
Everyone just calm down! We have to stay in control! [the occupant is still trying to get out, and everyone on the plane faces the lavatory door. The occupant begins to grunt and growl]
Passenger 4
[at one of the doors] I won't become one of them! [forces it open. It rips away, and he flies out. Other things fly out behind them. The other passengers and crew hang on for dear life. The occupant finally exits the lavatory]
Copilot
Shoot it! [instead of waiting for Cartman to shoot the occupant, he takes Cartman's gun and shoots him. The occupant ducks and the bullet ricochets a few times. It hits the ceiling, which causes an explosion.]
South Park Elementary playground, day. Butters is skipping rope with a bunch of girls while Stan and Kyle play catch the football with some other guys
Girls
Engine engine #9 running down Chicago Line, if the train should jump the track do you want your money back? [the plane appears and only Stan notices it falling to its doom]
Butters
Yes.
Girls
Y-E-S spells yes- [the plane hits a mountain top, then breaks apart as it goes down the mountain.]
Mr. Mackey's office, some time later
Mr. Mackey
Now, Token, what you need to understand, m'kay, is that a school assembly is not the time and the place to be yellin' and causin' distractions. M'kay? If there's somebody causin' you problems, then we don't disrupt the assembly, m'kay. You come and you talk to me.
Token
He's just out looking for trouble.
Mr. Mackey
Well that's your side of it, Token, but you know Eric has his side as well. Have you thought about maybe writin' him a poem? M'kay? Write E- write Eric a poem, tell him how you feel. [smoke from the plane crash rises behind the mountains] You know, m'kay? Well I'm tellin' you, Token, you let it go, and he'll let it go, and it'll all be fine. Can ya?
The crash site. Cartman comes to and leaves the wreckage. Nelly's Mom is nearby, and she's calling someone
Nelly's Mom
No, the plane crashed. We're in the Colorado mountains somewhere. [the call drops] Matt? Matt?! [notices Cartman and walks up to him to explain] My husband. He said the outbreak was all over the news, but everything was totally fine where he was.
Cartman
Totally fine? Then it hasn't happened yet. Oh my God, we still have time!
Pilot
[barely alive] Help! Help me! [Cartman runs up to him] Please, I have two little girls in Chicago. Please find them!
Cartman
It's okay. We have reason to believe it hasn't spread yet.
Pilot
Then you have to stop it.
Nelly's Mom
Yes!
Pilot
And there must be... a Patient Zero... The person it all starts from.
Cartman
His name is Token.
Nelly's Mom
We have to kill him, before he infects everyone else!
Cartman
I won't do it! He used to be my friend!
Pilot
You have to! You have to be strong. If you can stop this- if you can save the world- then you have to do it. [coughs up blood] Promise me! Promise... me!
Cartman
[sighs] Alright. I promise. I won't let the black people riot and destroy the world.
Pilot
Thank you-wait, what? [sits up, but dies a few seconds later]
Nelly's Mom
Oh my God! Oh my God!
Cartman
We're gonna live through this! Do you hear me?!
Nelly's Mom
Yes!
Cartman
[takes her hand] Come on! [they leave the crash site]
Butters' house, day. He's watching TV from the sofa
Reporter
First, a wave of 911 calls about a virus, and now a plane has apparently gone down in the Colorado Rocky Mountains. Is this the beginning of the end?
Butters
Oh boy! Zombie apocalypse!
Reporter
The government is looking for a Patient Zero, going only off of this sketch which was found in a notebook at the airport.

[Butters suddenly recognizes the person in the picture] Anyone with information regarding Patient Zero is asked to contact the authorities immediately.

Butters
Holy Moly.
Jimbo's Guns, day. Cartman and Nelly's Mom reach it and go inside. Cartamn closes the door
Jimbo
Can I help you?
Cartman
Stay by the window! Tell me if anything changes! [walks up to the counter] I need something that can shoot with complete accuracy from a distance.
Jimbo
Alright, you want a rifle! [turns around and takes a rifle from the wall, then turns back and hands it to Cartman] well, like this .22 caliber. [Cartman looks it over, and Jimbo puts his hand on his hip] What is it you intend to shoot?
Cartman
A person. [Nelly's Mom looks around]
Jimbo
...You mean a person who's threatening you?
Cartman
Threatening all of us!
Nelly's Mom
Please, please hurry! It's important!
Jimbo
Well, you should be fine so long as the person breaks into your house and is an immediate threat to you.
Cartman
What?! How am I supposed to get a person to break into my house?!
Jimbo
You can't shoot someone who threatens you just out on the street. Well unless of course you're in a state that has a "stand your ground" law.
Cartman
Stand my ground?
Nelly's Mom
Please! We're running out of time!
Jimbo
See now with a "stand your ground" law, you could legally shoot somebody that's threatening you whether they're in your house or not.
Cartman
Yes yes, that's what I need! I'll take that!
Jimbo
No, no, see, you've gotta be IN a state with a "stand your ground" law, like Florida.
Cartman
[walks away from the counter] This is hopeless. How am I supposed to shoot Token with all these stupid rules?! [his eyes light up] Wait a minute. I can't shoot Token, [turns around] but I can shoot anyone I want in Florida?
Jimbo
So long as they're threatening you.
Nelly's Mom
What?! What is it, please?! Hurry, my husband might still be alive!
Cartman
The other way to stop the outbreak. Token isn't the only Patient Zero. The outbreak won't happen if... we shoot George Zimmerman. We have to get to Florida!
Cartman and Nelly's Mom are back at Denver Airport, and the sequence of events from the first plane crash repeat themselves here: Cartman and Nelly's Mom run into the airplane
Cartman
Let's go, let's go! Let's move move move move! Let's go![the plane takes off. Once in the air...] Find the closest airport in Florida! [injects himself with something]
Flight Attendant
This plane is going to Baltimore.
Cartman
If we don't get to Florida there's not going to be a Baltimore left! [everyone sits down] Black guy in the back! [the plane crashes into the Everglades. Cartman and Nelly's Mom make it out of the wreckage] Alight, now let's find Zimmerman.
Florida, evening. A weather-beaten yellow truck crashes into a state sign. Cartman and Nelly's Mom get out and meet behind the truck bed. Cartman opens up his bag.
Cartman
Put this on. We have to stay hidden from here out. [hands her a black sweater, which she puts on as she walks onto the roadway]
Nelly's Mom
What are we going to do?
Cartman
I'm going to flush out Patient Zero. And you're gonna shoot him. It's the only way.
Nelly's Mom
What if he attacks us first?
Cartman
Don't worry, nobody can see us wearing black.
Nelly's Mom
I haven't had the time to thank you, for doing what you've d- [a Moov-It truck slams into her and carries her body away. Cartman is confused]
Florida, day. The camera pans down and lands on the Zimmerman residence. A family is seated in the breakfast nook in the kitchen. The girls are giggling.
Mom
[serving pancakes] Eat your breakfast, girls. [turns around to put the pan back on the stove]
Older Daughter
Where's Daddy?
Mom
You can eat without your father in the room. Now hurry. [the girls giggle and the older one notices someone]
Older Daughter
Daddy!
George Zimmerman
Good morning, girls. [walks in fully dressed, with a cup of coffee already in hand.] Save Daddy any pancakes? Look at that? Six A.M. and my family is already smiling. [Mom walks over and kisses him]
Mom
How did I get such a perfect husband, Geroge Zimmerman?
George Zimmerman
And how did I get such a beautiful wife?
Older Daughter
I love you, Dad.
George Zimmerman
I love you too, Princess. I love both of you, equally.
Mom
Nothing can ever go wrong, so long as we all have each other.
Reporter
[on TV] Is there any hope for stopping the zombie apocalypse? [George Zimmerman turns around to see the news] CNN has just received word that the government has learned the identity of Patient Zero. [the drawing of Token is shown] The nine year old threat to humanity has been tracked down, and measures are being taken to stop him.
Younger Daughter
Daddy, what's a Patient Zero? [a knock is heard at the front door. George Zimmerman turns left and walks to the front door. He opens it and two federal agents face him]
Agent 1
Hello, Mr. Zimmerman. Your country needs you.
George Zimmerman
What do you need from me?
Agent 1
We... [holds up a photo of Token] need you to shoot a young African-American for us.
George Zimmerman
[turns and walks away] I gave that up.
Agent 2
You're the best, Zimmerman. We just need you to do it one more time, for the security of the world!
George Zimmerman
Damnit, I have a wife and kids now.
Agent 1
Then do it for your family! [Cartman appears on the sidewalk, wearing black face paint and a black sweater] This is about protecting people, Zimmerman! Keeping our streets safe so that our children are free to go out... [his voice trails off as Zimmerman focuses on something else]
George Zimmerman
Something's wrong. [quickly turns around and sees the stranger] Look out! [grabs the gun from one of the agent and fires it twice. Cartman's arm gets hit by a bullet and he falls to the ground]
Agent 1
My God, I didn't even see him. [the other agent walks over to the body]
Agent 2
Nice work, Zimmerman. [George turns and walks over to his family]
George Zimmerman
Are you guys okay?
Older Daughter
What was that, Daddy?
George Zimmerman
More needless violence.
Agent 1
Nonsense, you did what you had to. You're a hero.
George Zimmerman
That may be true, but I'll have to live with this the rest of my life. Even though I'll be walking around a free man.
Agent 2
[notices the paint coming off Cartman's face] Hey, wait a minute. This kid isn't black, he's white.
George Zimmerman
Wait, what?
A courtroom. This is a speedy trial. The judge announces his decision with two blows of the gavel
Judge
Guilty!
The electic chair. George Zimmerman is tied down to it and the operator brings the switch down for three seconds, then raises it. He lowers it again for two seconds and raises it. Then he does this three times more for a fraction of a second each, then a final time for half a second.
A news report
Reporter
The zombie apocalypse... is over. All the panic, crashing planes and chaos appear to have, for some reason, died with George Zimmerman. And as for the little boy who was so mercilessly gunned down? [a picture of Cartman smiling appears, his left shoulder in a bandage, his right hand giving a thumbs up] Although he survived the shooting, his wishes are to remain anonymous, giving the hospital only the nickname... "Brad Pitt." ...But cooler.
At one of the boys' homes. Eight of them are sitting around watching the news: Clyde, Kyle, Stan, and Craig on the sofa; Jimmy, Kenny and Butters in front of Clyde, and Token sitting by himself near Craig.
Stan
That sure wasn't much of a zombie apocalypse.
Kyle
Yeah, that sucked.
Butters
Well, at least I'll bet Token's glad it's over with. Aren't you, Token? [Token just stands up, looks at the other guys, and walks out. Butters' smile fades]
On the street, day. Cartman is in the distance, looking at Token. Token notices and faces him
Cartman
Hey Token. ...Sup bro? ...How's it goin' dude? I know how it feels now.
Token
You made everyone think I'm a fucking Patient Zero!
Cartman
Dude, I'm saying I'm sorry.
Token
So what?!
Cartman
Uh oh. [brings forth a can of red spray paint and paints a red circle around himself in the middle of the street] Sounds like you're still angry, Token.
Token
Fuck you!
Cartman
Alright Token, come on! This is ridiculous. I know you totally wanna kick my ass right now. You'd like to walk right up and punch me in the face, but what's that gonna solve? I've got a way better idea. [makes a fist with his right hand and puts it forth] First bump? [Token stays put] Come on dude, fist bump. Bump that shit bro. Be the bigger person. [Token walks up to the red circle, then bends forward and offers his left fist. Then he steps into the circle and Cartman quickly shoots him]
Token
Oh! [falls on his face]
Cartman
That was, he was on my ground. You all saw that, right? Everything inside the red line is mine. [drags Token's body into the circle] Inside the red line is, that's- that's my ground. He was on it. [smiles when no one answers.]
Cartman's dream, day. He's sailing off in his Brad Pitt costume, with his dream family looking on from shore.
Gerry's Daughters
Daddy!
Gerry
What's up girls? Daddy did it!
Mr. Garrison's class, day. Token is absent. Cartman wakes up screaming... during class. Mr. Garrison crosses his arms again
Cartman
Ugh! Oh man. The ending to that movie was so terrible.
Kyle
You're having nightmares about the ending to World War Z again?
Cartman
Yeah. So bad.
Kyle
That's what bothering you? Not the fact that you're a murderer?
Cartman
Jury found me innocent, Kyle!
Kyle
You're a murderer.
Cartman
You interrupt people when they talk.
Mr. Mackey
[over the PA system] Eric Cartman to the counselor's office please.
Cartman
Oh man! [walks out of the room]
Mr. Mackey's office, moments later. Cartman walks in. Token and Cartman immediately notice each other
Cartman
Oh boy.
Mr. Mackey
Have a seat, Eric. Now boys, I for one am sick and tired of this little feud you're having, okay? This has clearly gone too far, and you owe each other an apology or you're gettin' detention!
Token
An apology?! He shot me!
Mr. Mackey
Well he was technically standing his ground, Token.
Cartman
Yeah Token, that's the law! Everything inside the red line is lava.
Token
[stands on his chair] Well it's a pretty fucking stupid law!
Cartman
Token, calm down.
Token
And why does standing your ground not apply to fucking white people?!
Cartman
Oh God, here we go again! [runs out of the office in a panic]
End of World War Zimmerman
  1703: "World War Zimmerman" edit
Story Elements

George Zimmerman • "I Was Not the Bullet" • "It's a Beautiful Day" • Tesla Driver

Media

ImagesScriptsWatch Episode

Release

South Park: The Complete Seventeenth Season