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American-Canadian War

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South Park - Bigger, Longer & Uncut-24 36331

The battlefield.

The American-Canadian War is a fictional war in the movie South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut. As the name would suggest, it involved the United States and Canada, but also took on a more sinister element when the army of Hell involved itself due to a prophecy. According to Terrance and Phillip: Behind the Blow, 8 million people lost their lives in the war.

Background

The Canadian comics, Terrance and Phillip, star in a vulgar movie named Asses of Fire. The Boys and Ike wish to see this movie, and pay a homeless man to buy tickets for them due to their minority. After seeing the movie, they start using swear words during class. Inevitably their parents find out about this vulgarity, and forbid their children from viewing the movie again. However, the children witness the film one more time, and Kenny decides to recreate a stunt from it. It involves lighting a fart on fire, but, as it is Kenny, the stunt goes wrong and he is incinerated. Kenny is taken to the hospital, where Dr. Doctor replaces his heart with a baked potato, causing him to die. Kenny's death prompts the parents, led by Sheila Broflovski, to form "Mothers Against Canada (MAC)." They blame Terrance and Philip (and Canada) for their children's misdeeds instead of themselves, and have the two comics arrested in preparation for execution. The Canadian ambassador in the U.S.A. demands their release, but is unsuccessful, so Canada declares war on the USA.

The War

The war begins when the Canadian Air Force bombs the residence of the Baldwin brothers. The United States then declares war on Canada, and Mrs. Broflovski, recently appointed Secretary of Offense, orders the execution of "war criminals," Terrance and Phillip.

This angers the children, which prompts Cartman to sing a song entitled "Kyle's Mom is a Bitch." When Mrs. Broflovski overhears him, she has a V-Chip placed in his brain in order to prevent him from swearing.

Meanwhile, in Hell, Satan and Saddam Hussein discover that there is a war going on Earth. Satan says with delight that it has been prophesied that he can return to earth once the blood of "the innocent" touches the ground.

With Terrance and Phillip set to be executed, Stan, Kyle, and Cartman decide to do "what Brian Boitano would do" and form "La Resistance." A new boy in South Park, Gregory of Yardale, comes up with a daring plan to rescue Terrance and Phillip. Stan, who is concerned that his girlfriend, Wendy, is interested in Gregory, insists upon carrying out the plan so that Wendy will like him, but keeps in mind Chef's advice that to win her love he needs to find the Clitoris. Stan, Kyle, and Cartman are sent to find "The Mole", who turns out to be a God-hating French boy. He agrees to help them rescue Terrance and Phillip, who are to be executed in the electric chair during a USO show.

The USO show begins, and the boys begin executing the plan. Cartman, tasked with turning off the power shortly before the execution begins, is frightened when the ghost of Kenny warns him that Saddam and Satan are coming. He runs off without turning off the power, causing the Mole to be spotted and killed by guard dogs. Kyle and Stan desperately run to the stage to prevent the execution, but Kyle cannot bring himself to stand up to his mom, who orders the execution to start.

Suddenly, a surprise Canadian attack begins. Cartman rushes to turn off the electric chairs and receives a mild jolt that causes the V-Chip to malfunction, while Americans and Canadians start battling each other. Stan finds the "clitoris" which tells him to save Terrance and Phillip. He asks about Wendy, and the clitoris tells him to be confident because "chicks love confidence." Meanwhile, Terrance and Phillip attempt to escape but are blocked by American forces. Just as they are about to be killed Stan, Kyle, and the rest of "La Resistance" stand in front of them. Kyle finally decides to stand up to his mom and says he wants her to stop fighting all these battles and just be his mom. She ignores him and shoots Terrance and Phillip in the head.

When their blood touches the ground, Satan and Saddam burst out from hell and begin wreaking havoc. Satan is quickly pushed aside by Saddam, who makes everyone bow down to him while Satan watches. Kenny insists that Satan stand up to Saddam, while Cartman discovers that the jolt to the V-Chip gave him the power to shoot electricity when he swears. He quickly uses this power to attack Saddam. Saddam calls for Satan to help, but Satan had finally enough and kills Saddam.

Satan thanks Kenny for his help and grants him one wish. Kenny wishes for everything to go back to the way it was before the war started, even though that means he will go back to hell. Satan grants his wish and everything returns to normal. Everyone sings a song about their happy ending and, in the final scene, Kenny is shown on his way to Heaven.

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